You, Me And She...(or is it he?)

Pictures of my colorful, fake-ass tree (*sigh* I'm so weak) coming in the next post, I promise, but I simply MUST get this off my chest.

As the two-line post prior to filling out Veronica's meme suggested, I've reached my boiling point with women. In the post since that one, I've had more drama with the female gender than a lil bit, and short of turning into Ike Turner or Ted Bundy, I really don't have a clue WHAT to do. But I think my inspiration for this post once again comes from La's take-no-prisoners style of posting (see her entry about bitchassness in dudes for a reference).

I wish Diddy, in his eloquent way, had an on-the-spot companion to bitchassness. Much like the Biblical Fable goes about woman being created from the rib of man, Diddy should've taken a rib from bitchassness and created a saying to explain the fraudulent behavior of Eve's descendants. Being that I'm starving for my Monday usual of a Philly chicken from the local cheesesteak place with the 16 year old waitress (yes, I'm STILL mad at myself about that), I can't come up with anything as I'm writing, but only God knows where my mind will take me.

Alls I know is this - women want male privilege. It's clear as crystal to me now, all this time I thought I was being singled out for being fat, dark-skinned and less than handsome, but I know that's not always the case now. Still is in some cases, but not all. How many times have we heard about women all of a sudden "playing the field" or "having a team set up" for each individual need? Don't answer, because we already know. Some of y'all reading this are guilty of it, LOL.

Now mind you, I don't begrudge anyone for their personal feelings, thoughts, gameplan or whatever gets them off. That's what happens when you're grown - you find out what you like, what works for you, and you flow with it. However, I just wish that regular cats like me wouldn't get caught up in the games women tend to play. I saw it on a less than PG-13 message board I frequent where this one girl spread out the types of men a woman may have on her "team:"

1) A guy who strokes a woman's ego, lavishes her with compliments, is the shoulder to cry on when dudes treat her like crap and will never be "The Man" because of his availability to her every need.

2) A guy who is a sugar daddy...one who lives by the hip-hop adage "It ain't trickin' if you got it."

3) The dude who ain't good for anything else other than breaking her back.

4) The would-be boyfriend, the guy (or sucker, depending on your perspective) a woman likes for a permanent relationship, BUT she wants to make him wait for the goodies.

I. CALL. BULLSHIT. The number four dude, save for numero uno, is the saddest out of the equation because he's doing everything right. You probably know him: Educated cat, self-sufficient, childless, relatively clean all around, but he JUST doesn't give off the aura of what all women really want in their lives - a bonafide asshole. The myth of a woman wanting to be treated like a queen is just that - a myth. Hence number 1 being undesirable because he's telling her she's got it going on and she deserves better treatment than what she's settling for. Honestly...she ain't settling! That's what she wants! Women don't want a nice guy, they want a guy who will dog them out and play around with their feelings because that element of drama somehow is the new Black.

And how does this translate to women wanting male privilege? Simple really.

Playing the field? Check.
Role Players? Check.
Sacrificing a good thing because of trifling immaturity and an inherent lack of self-control? DOUBLE check.

Yes, I just threw my gender under the bus as well. We might not have our game down the same way women do, but it's still the same game. I know many guys who have thrown away educated career women with decent personalities because she wasn't stacked enough, or her hair was too short, or she made too much more money than he does.

Those women, the ones who are rejected or who have been played by guys make up their mind that hey, anything you can do, I can do better. And so women begin hyping themselves up and building their empires, because they want to show guys that women are indeed equal because - hello, they were created from the side of a man. Sadly, this is where regular guys get screwed over because women drag us into their cat and mouse games with these guys that have hurt them or made fools of them, and regular guys in turn end up hurt, sad and, in my case, amazingly bitter.

This needs to stop. I not only speak for me, I speak for my cousin, who was held hostage for three years by a girl who claimed he was the father of her child only to find out that he wasn't - after he was paying child support and everything else for the kid. I speak for an acquaintance of mine who might be suffering from the worst case of blue balls ever after a woman came over his house, spent the night, went down on him and left him hanging saying she "can't do this." I speak for the millions (....AND MILLIONS!) of educated, employed, intelligent, kind, humorous nice guys who get their hearts DDT'd by women every day who feel like they have to prove something to the assholes by treating the regular guy like a doormat.

Women - get over it. Most times, the guy who you see as a liability is NOT the one that hurt you. You lament being unable to find a good man, but how many times have you passed over a good man, or even worse, treated a good man like something underneath your feet because of resentment you're harboring over a bad choice in a previous relationship/beneficial arrangment/whatever?

Simply put women, you can't be us. And if you think about it, why would you want to be?