Rhymes with 2009...

You've seen it on your friends' facebook and myspace statuses.

"Shine in '09!"
"Fine in '09!"
"[Insert whatever you want] is mine in '09!"

Clearly we've entered a new year, which is the last one of this decade, if you can believe that. Doesn't it seem like yesterday folks were Y2K-proofing their computers and reading their Bibles and praying when the countdown began for 2000? Yes, time flies very fast, which is why I'm hoping I can get over my tumultuous 2008 and make a way for better times in 2009 (See? There goes another one!).

'08 was certainly an up and down year for me, unlike anything I ever experienced, but being that it was my first full year as a self-sufficient career man (and a leap year at that), I think I managed pretty well. Some of the ups include:

- Getting back on track with my diet and exercise, even though the Holidays proved to be what I thought they were - a time to grub. Needless to say after today, it's back to work.

- Validation and compliments from my job's clientele. Needless to say those are the folks that make us go, and when I'm at games and they come up to me and say "you're doing a fantastic job, keep up the good work," it can't help but bring a smile to my face every time. What's even better when I hear from a co-worker that people think I'm a good guy along with the work I do. Needless to say I plan to focus more on the good than the bad with my gig. Hey, at least I have one.

- The Phillies winning the World Series! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I can say in my lifetime that my favorite baseball team won a world championship and I was able to witness it all the way through. I wasn't born the last time they won (1980) so being a fan of a World Series championship team is a new and exciting thrill for me.

- Discovering strength that I really didn't know I had. I spent a lot of 2008 going through drama. Work, women, family, friends, hell even my toilet flooded my apartment Tuesday and I'm still trying to dry out and get the funk out of my crib behind that. All of that tells me that 1) The traits of the old Chris are fading away and 2) That last blast of foolishness I encountered in the last week of the year is making way for great things in 2009. I truly believe that. The old Chris would've flown off the deep end, snapped out and left things unresolved. Now I can find a way to get things done without panicking and making them worse than what they are. Well, in certain cases.

- Starting the process of self-discovery and acceptance. I still have a long ways to go, but as some of my posts suggest, I have no fear of putting everything about me out there as a means of trying to figure out what's going wrong and how I can correct it. I still have some things I need to bring to the surface, but I did a good job of recognizing my faults and trying to tranquilize them, if you will, as I move forward.

We can't forget the downs, and there were a ton of those, so I'll just stick to the ones that had the greatest impact on me:

- Christmas in Dramaville. Needless to say my 30 hour stay at home didn't go over well. Without putting family business out there, I'll just say that this Christmas has forced me to re-evaluate my longing for "home" and my relationship with my family and friends. It's something that has messed with me since I got back to Maryland, but I'm planning to figure out what it will take to make things right.

- Women. And that creates a subdivsion of issues, problems and situations that include;

I. A woman telling me I should be gay because no woman would ever want me
II. Me going over a woman's house, engaging in certain acts before she stopped me and lied about having to pick up her daughter, who she said was out of town.
III. Being on the phone with a woman for just about five hours only for her to say she's too tired to hook up but that she still wants to do so. Haven't heard from her since.
IV. The False Friend Drama, which you guys know all about.
V. A woman telling me she didn't want to make it seem like she could be bought, but continues to co-own a house with a man that openly cheats on her and is still married to his previous wife legally.
VI. Blogger beef. Yeah, even here. I guess I can't escape it.
VII. 90 Day Rules
VIII. Women who still want to use me for "friendship," but will turn to (and get turned out by) other guys for physical needs on a regular basis. And that's just SOME of the crap I encountered from women in 2008.

- Work. Even with the aforementioned compliements and positive feedback from clientele, I still got picked on ad nauseum for stuff I have no control over. I've contemplated quitting, but doing so in this recession without a job lined up is like giving R. Kelly a kindergarten class - just stupid. I'm just going to tough it out to the best of my ability and begin evaluating my options.

So with the recap done, here are some of the things I hope to accomplish in 2009;

- A new job. I said I would focus on the good rather than the bad, but this particular part of Maryland is NOT where I want to spend the rest of my life, so let the games begin.

- Keep losing weight. I dropped about 22 pounds from March to November 29th, so only God knows if I've picked some back up, but like I said, tomorrow, we get back on track.

- Do more of the grown up. Which is funny, considering I had more partners this year than ever before (yep, even with the drama, I still managed to get some every once in a blue moon), but I still feel like I'm missing out on some playatastic experiences. How to go about setting it off? Only time will tell.

- Oh wait, I know how. Be more social. And this is the hard part. I still kinda rely on this here machine to try and meet and hook up with women, but it doesn't work as much as I want to. However, what can you do when you're still afraid to be seen in public? Yeah, like I said, this is the hard part.

- Be less flexible. I bend TOO much. For women, for my job, for everybody. I need to learn to stand my ground and not really be swayed by negative or contrived persuasion to do things I don't want to do.

- Be an asshole to women. Hey, seems to be the only way to get attention, so let's see if it works.

- Be happy. Somehow, I've got to find out what makes me smile, what makes me content, what makes me forget about my problems and cares and just latch on to that.

I hope everyone had a great time in bringing in the New Year right!