The Post Game Show

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Epiphany

Well, I think it finally sunk in. After years and years of being anti-social, loner-ish, and flat out unwilling to move out of my comfort zone, it's registering with me. I haven't lived life. AT ALL. Tonight, I'm sitting here just randomly listening to most of the songs I have on my computer, and here's a fact about me that might be of some interest to you guys; I can identify memories and where I was at when certain songs and albums were hot. As I ran through my playlists and just started reminiscing on things and time periods that honestly could've been better. I thought about how I had no memories of parties or events that weren't sports-related, no nightmare/blind/great dates, nothing. They really ain't lyin' when they say college is the best time of your life and you should enjoy it. I truly blew my chance.

Of course I can't turn back the hands of time, so that's over and done. Now that I'm on my own and 26 years old, that's my main concern. What can I do NOW to add something different to my life? I honestly don't know.

I've pretty much been hiding behind a computer screen since I was 17, so I really don't know how to carry myself in social situations, and it shows. I've been here in Maryland for a month, and I don't know ANYBODY outside of my office. My reliance on the internet for conversation is typical for me and maddening to others who seem to think I'm funny as hell and great to know. If only I believed that about myself.

I do want to change, I want to be able to look back and say I did something with my life outside of my profession, but I don't know how to go about it. I'm taking suggestions.

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