Aftermath

Being along with your own thoughts can be a scary thing, especially when they start speaking truths you damn sure weren't prepared for.

Thanks are due to all who handed out some constructive words and opinions on my last post. I've had some sobering moments as of late in the aftermath of that post, and I'm starting to see what kind of person I really am towards women and it's embarrassing and saddens me.

99 percent of the time, I fail to think of women as humans with emotions, feelings, lives, thoughts, etc. I feel bad because I wasn't raised that way. I could blame it on single motherhood, woman can't raise a boy to be a man and all that jazz. But my mom did teach me, among many of her great lessons, to treat people how you want to be treated. Somehow in my social exile and reliance on technology, I lost my way in that sense.

I really haven't spent much time out in my life other than work and the occasional sojourn, my true and honest time around women in person is almost non-existent. So I guess I let TV, music and yes, adult entertainment, guide my perception of women and it really has gotten out of hand.

I'm really afraid of this loner mentality I've enveloped myself in because I know now that it's not completely women, although I have come across some bad ones. I'm fully aware that my inability to step outside of my comfort zone and at least try to interact with women in person has led to this crappy attitude and that I really don't deserve any sort of time from any woman right now.