Because I'm bored waiting for Game Four of the World Series...
I'm asking all women who read my blog (and tell your friends so they can come respond and help) to help me figure out y'all to SOME degree. Do you or do you not sleep with a guy you like without making jump through hoops of fire? I'm so serious about this because from about age 16 til now, I've noticed the few women that have allegedly "liked" me have almost no interest in having sex with me. Recently as this week, I had a girl say she liked me, gave me compliments (which I'm starting to think was bs because no woman has ever seen anything good in me) then when she talked about hanging out or coming to visit, she said it would take three or four visits for something physical to occur. Uh...huh?
I'm sorry, but from what I've seen and heard and lived with in my college days, it didn't take three or four dates/hangouts/whatever for two consenting adults to get physical. Maybe my expectations are shot or my thought process is wrong, but if you like a person, you'll do something with them, period. My feeling is women don't want to have anything physical to do with me because of my looks and my weight, which means they really don't like me. I've seen numerous guys who have women liking them whenever, wherever.
So help me out: Am I wrong for thinking that women don't like me because they won't have sex with me? Or am I right and discovering the painful truth that women just hate me through and through? Floor's yours. Oh, and by the way, anonymous comments will be deleted unless they have some merit :)
I'm sorry, but from what I've seen and heard and lived with in my college days, it didn't take three or four dates/hangouts/whatever for two consenting adults to get physical. Maybe my expectations are shot or my thought process is wrong, but if you like a person, you'll do something with them, period. My feeling is women don't want to have anything physical to do with me because of my looks and my weight, which means they really don't like me. I've seen numerous guys who have women liking them whenever, wherever.
So help me out: Am I wrong for thinking that women don't like me because they won't have sex with me? Or am I right and discovering the painful truth that women just hate me through and through? Floor's yours. Oh, and by the way, anonymous comments will be deleted unless they have some merit :)
posted by Chris @ 5:20 PM
11 Comments:
At 1:38 PM,
Mizrepresent said…
ummm, i think it is more about trying to make sure this thing between you two is more than a sex thing. Most women want to be more than jumpoffs. WE withhold the "goodies" until we can safely say, you are our friend and will still respect us the next day, or we are and can be more than friends. Most women are sexually driven by acts of kindness, and romance...even when we are physically ready to give it up, we are most likely not. Now, as you get older, you tend to be a bit more secure about yourself and what you want, and so things may go down just like you like it, but still...none of us want to feel like jumpoffs. I'd say give it some time, spend some time, create the spark, and then get ready for the big boom!
At 10:50 PM,
Jameil said…
never have been, never will be that girl to give it up with the quickness no matter how much i like a guy. EVERYONE has to put in work. you don't get a pass b/c i thought you were cute and had redeeming qualities. you still have to prove it. and this isn't college anymore. even the chicks who were smash happy are starting to realize we're getting too old for that foolishness (unless they're not keen on building relationships). how does making you wait 3 or 4 interactions become they have no interest in you? maybe, just maybe, their appreciation to you isn't completely tied to the physical.
At 12:03 PM,
Anonymous said…
Lurker.....
Yeah I think you have the wrong idea.....those females that just give it up right off the bat more than likely dont even want a relationship they just want a quickie (watch out for burners condoms dont prevent all stds)which is probably the reason all of your relationships haven't been more than 3 sessions....personally I dont give it up till I'm in a relationship, have been awhile and theres strong emotions,no female who likes a guy wants to give it up to only hear after "oh we'll were just friends it was just sex and we never made it official".......
Oh and don't base how it works with other people to your situation....different strokes for different folks
At 4:19 PM,
Chris said…
Miz, Jameil and Anonymous, this is my issue. Women don't mind hooking up or doing things with guys who look like (or are) athletes, entertainers, thugs, etc...but because I'm a step below those guys, it's like how dare I have sexual desires. It's a shallow double standard and I don't like it at all.
At 12:25 AM,
chon said…
i agree that a lot of women are driven by acts of kindess and sweet nothings...but i also think that there are some women who are shallow enough to think that just because you look a certain way, you can't be "the one". idk, women are complicated but we have a method to our madness. when the righ one comes, you won't have to worry about any of this tho so that's the bright side ;-) hang in there. there are a few good ones left.
At 5:15 PM,
Anonymous said…
i have a question.....do you want a girlfriend or just a nsa?
At 5:56 PM,
Chris said…
Whit the good ones are all taken and the rest just dog me out.
Anon, why should it matter? Other guys can have their choice and chances, why can't I? Oh yeah, that's right, has everything to do with what's in my profile picture.
At 11:34 PM,
Mizrepresent said…
Chris, the motivation with entertainers, athletes is more about what they have and less about what they look like. I mean, come on...if Jayzee wasn't a bigtime rapper, do you seriously think he would have pulled a Beyonce? Not. So i hear you on that. But most of us are just normal, everyday people and so we look for more than just your looks, at least i think we should. Man, i really think you are over analyzing...and should just continue to improve you until you meet the right one...now i know you are asking, who is the right one? The answer...the one who reciprocates.
At 2:19 AM,
spchrist said…
Chris...you might be saving yourself some trouble by not sleeping with a lot of the women out there. A lot of women are plain confused when it comes to sex and it might not be you but more so the women.
At 3:08 PM,
Anonymous said…
I agree with Miz. Nobody was checking for Biggie because of how he looked (or didn't). He rich and famous. Can we all say Lil Wayne? Seriously? He has kids with Lauren London, Nivea and Toya. Seriously? That's about the $$$ and nothing else.
Keep improving the person that you want to be. The woman for you will be drawn to you. And to her, you will look fantastic.
At 8:35 AM,
Horace said…
In my opinion one and all should browse on it.
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