The Gift of Gab...or not
Before I begin with the topic that has racked my brain for about 24 hours, I just want to say that BeBe and CeCe Winans tricked the mess out of me. I'm sure everyone has heard of the song "Addictive Love," and from the way it sounds (beautiful mid-tempo cut where they go back and forth...typical Winans formula/flavor) I thought BeBe and CeCe had a brief dalliance into R&B or secular music (sho'nuff, thanks to Wikipedia, I found out the song was a Billboard R&B chart Number One late in the summer of 1991). I really thought they were singing about love of a romantic kind, but they were singing about their love for Jesus Christ. It's the Black Folks' version of Debbie Boone's "You Light Up My Life," where nobody had a clue that they were singing about the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit. I swore this song was gonna be on my wedding playlist if I ever get married. It still may be, but dang, what a twist.
Anyway, on to the topic for today. In another forum I belong to, a woman brought up a theory that dudes talk themselves out of sex with women by saying something dumb/offensive/that doesn't make sense, and the fact that women decide within the first five minutes (or less) whether this dude is someone they want to sleep with or not. Now pardon me for being inquisitive, but I could've sworn that women HATE when men think of sex right off the bat. I mean of course women think that once we're sure she's a born woman that the lower head takes over with the thinking and we spend all of our time trying to get you in bed. Well that's true for about 92 percent of us, but I just find the double-standard to be a bit odd.
In the forum, women shared stories about dudes who caught their eye, but then said something that invariably ruined whatever chance he had of advancing things. Others said that men have taken the lead from women in being talkative and that women like the "strong, silent type" for a reason. Another thing that confuses me. Y'all swear a man that doesn't talk is boring, yet when a dude tries to engage in some conversation, he becomes emasculated. What part of the game is that?
To me this is just another move in a long, drawn-out game of Chess (or depending on the IQ of the woman, checkers) that takes a toll on those of us of the male gender that don't have a clue where the hell women are coming from.
Back on topic though, that has to be a trip to know that a corny joke you might think is hilarious, or you might have a witty comment about religions or neighborhoods or anything might automatically disqualify you from hot lovely relations because a woman is offended/annoyed/angered/irritated. This is why guys indeed have to be on top of their game and on their toes at all times because you never really know what's going through a woman's head when you talk to her, even though some women have expressive faces that are pretty much a parallel with Homeland Security's terror alert color coding. Like furrowed brow = "oh really", cutting of the eyes = "negro, you reachin'," slight smile = "I'm interested, keep talking." And that last one is sure enough a trick bag, you have to be careful because if the smile disappears, say goodnight.
So I open the floor to women readers of The Post Game Show, despite those of you who think I'm misogynistic, to answer me this; is it true? Do y'all really figure out in less than 5 minutes if a dude has what it takes to earn your goodies? What the hell can a man say to shut those feelings off? And this last one...I thought y'all didn't think about sex. Kidding...only half-kidding. Fellas, if you want to weigh in, you can as well. I need to hear all sides of this argument.
Anyway, on to the topic for today. In another forum I belong to, a woman brought up a theory that dudes talk themselves out of sex with women by saying something dumb/offensive/that doesn't make sense, and the fact that women decide within the first five minutes (or less) whether this dude is someone they want to sleep with or not. Now pardon me for being inquisitive, but I could've sworn that women HATE when men think of sex right off the bat. I mean of course women think that once we're sure she's a born woman that the lower head takes over with the thinking and we spend all of our time trying to get you in bed. Well that's true for about 92 percent of us, but I just find the double-standard to be a bit odd.
In the forum, women shared stories about dudes who caught their eye, but then said something that invariably ruined whatever chance he had of advancing things. Others said that men have taken the lead from women in being talkative and that women like the "strong, silent type" for a reason. Another thing that confuses me. Y'all swear a man that doesn't talk is boring, yet when a dude tries to engage in some conversation, he becomes emasculated. What part of the game is that?
To me this is just another move in a long, drawn-out game of Chess (or depending on the IQ of the woman, checkers) that takes a toll on those of us of the male gender that don't have a clue where the hell women are coming from.
Back on topic though, that has to be a trip to know that a corny joke you might think is hilarious, or you might have a witty comment about religions or neighborhoods or anything might automatically disqualify you from hot lovely relations because a woman is offended/annoyed/angered/irritated. This is why guys indeed have to be on top of their game and on their toes at all times because you never really know what's going through a woman's head when you talk to her, even though some women have expressive faces that are pretty much a parallel with Homeland Security's terror alert color coding. Like furrowed brow = "oh really", cutting of the eyes = "negro, you reachin'," slight smile = "I'm interested, keep talking." And that last one is sure enough a trick bag, you have to be careful because if the smile disappears, say goodnight.
So I open the floor to women readers of The Post Game Show, despite those of you who think I'm misogynistic, to answer me this; is it true? Do y'all really figure out in less than 5 minutes if a dude has what it takes to earn your goodies? What the hell can a man say to shut those feelings off? And this last one...I thought y'all didn't think about sex. Kidding...only half-kidding. Fellas, if you want to weigh in, you can as well. I need to hear all sides of this argument.
posted by Chris @ 3:38 PM
3 Comments:
At 4:12 PM,
Southerner in Suomi said…
Ok first off, it's BeBe and CeCe, it ain't gonna be nothing but gospel. But it can definitely be a wedding song.
And women think about sex as much as men. Also, yes we decide fairly quickly if we will sleep with a man, but just because you have been deemed fuckable, doesn't mean we are going to actually do it. But you know hos make that statement hard to believe. And Chris, most of the men who think they know a lot of women, don't. They know a lot about hos and how to bed them.
And when we decide you're fuckable, that don't mean you've earned anything!! Like I said, we human too, we think about sex too.
At 10:33 PM,
Anonymous said…
Here's the bloody truth: women think about sex more than men.
Most may NEVER admit to it. I may be exonerated from the species for telling you. But it's true.
And yes, most of us decide if you're worthy of bedtime bliss in a really short time period. But best believe, you can talk your ass right up out of it too. Most men have no clue how close to heaven they really are.
At 4:37 AM,
Jameil said…
you are looking way too deep into saying something crazy. yes you can talk your way out if you say something offensive/foolish. it depends on the person, like everything else. its not personal if i don't like you as a person.
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