Book Review, or "It SEEMS easy, but...."

Before I begin, I must confess. Jameil was right. That poem was not about any particular woman, it's about the ongoing war between me, myself and I. So no faithful readers, I'm not in love, not in a relationship, not talking to anybody. Still in the same spot as I was before. Hopefully this book that I'm reading can at least assist in moving the process forward.

On a message board I frequent for reasons that can't be named, I came across a PDF file of Robert Greene's The Art of Seduction. Now, I had heard about this book before, not sure if anyone ever suggested I read it, but being a true bookworm, I'll gladly read anything once. That thinking came back to bite me in the behind when I picked up that book about brothers going to Brazil, but I digress.

Anyway, The Art of Seduction enchanted me from the foreword on. Greene expertly details the different types of successful seducers, gives famous examples of these types of people, what their strengths and weaknesses are. One that stuck out for me was the Demonic Rake, and the famous example was gossip journalist-turned WW I fighter pilot Gabriele D'Annunzio. He was considered, by late 19th century/early 20th century standards to be an unattractive man of no real wealth and was an annoyance to socialites and royalty who wanted to keep their business out of the streets.

So unattractive was D'Annunzio that these guys felt like he could be around their wives with no problem. Surely, a lowly, ugly journalist could NEVER draw any interest from beautiful, rich, high-society women. Well they shouldn't have left their girl 'round G, true playa fa real, ask the homey Pharrell! He would lavish the ladies with compliments tailored to their strengths, write passionate poems and letters to them, speak in this voice that couldn't help but captivate and boom...the knickers were his.

The similarities between Gabriele and Chris are there. For one, the original profession. Except I don't deal in rumors and innuendo, I deal with stats and scores (and how I love it!). Two, although a lot of you think there's nothing wrong with me physically, I feel inadequate when measured up against the tall, not-so-dark and handsome guys in shape that women can't get enough of. The similarities end obviously with Gabriele having the swagger to work these women into a frenzy with his words, in voice and on paper. I sighed longingly when I read that vignette about him because it seemed like he was an Italian me, but I just don't have the confidence to do what he did.

Another one of interest was "The Dandy." The Dandy is a person who is not held down by the ideal gender roles they are supposed to play in life, making for a flexible, androgynous character that appeals to the intended target. Damn, if that don't sound like my boy Prince. For about 30 years now, guys have wondered what women see in a 5'2 guy who wears high-heeled boots, some make-up and has a voice that doesn't necessarily scream macho. Well aside from being the most talented dude to pick up any musical instruments Post-Disco, his Dandy characteristics appeal to women who like to see more of themselves in men. Prince picked up on that, and he's been banging some of the hottest women in showbiz for YEARS. I don't think the Dandy method of seduction is for me, but I do see how it's worked so well for His Royal Badness.

Of course, for every Seducer, there is...the Anti-Seducer *dramatic music* And there are eight different types of anti-seducers that repel folks, and I fit a couple of these types. One is the Brute, and it's not as bad as it sounds. The Brute is basically someone who is impatient. That's apparently what makes for good seduction, the anticipation, the pursuit, things like that. I know I'm impatient, hence my issue with women wanting to get to know me or just be friends.

The Bumbler is definitely me, like I might get close here and there, but the Brutish tendencies tend to, well....bumble the opportunity to seduce. And yes, the Tightwad. One reason I don't date? It ain't cheap. I did say in my letter to myself that I had to stop thinking of dating as tricking or trying to buy a woman, but it just seems like "you want me to pay for this and you might not even be interested in me? HA!" Yes, I have a long way to go.

Greene also outlines victims, 18 in all, that would-be seducers should hone in on and go for the kill. I fit the mold of The Disappointed Dreamer. My dreams of being adored by women for just being myself have not come true, hence my feeling horribly about myself. Another one might be the Drama Queen, but I prefer to change it to King, thankyouverymuch! O.K., so this one IS me. I've been hurt, can't let go, and hold everyone else responsible for it. I'm still learning and still growing, so I can admit I've probably bumbled a few chances because I didn't get my way right away and it reminded me of another situation, probably at Del State, that went terribly wrong. And I'm also The Professor, who tends to over-analyze everything. Nothing else needs to be said about that one, LOL.

Finally, Greene gives the 24 steps to seduction, which pretty much involve pursuit, falling back, making your victim chase you, and then going for it all. This is where I really sighed and was drawn in because it seems like something anyone could pull off. It takes confidence, self assurance, a game plan, patience and a willingness to please. I only have the last one. If I could get the first four in my life, I'd have better luck dating and all.

I think that's why The Art of Seduction reeled me in the way it did - It was supposed to. I could not lose my place when I went to work briefly last night, so I left that page open on my computer, and when I was done covering the softball game, I came right back to the house and kept reading. That's what a good seduction does, keeps the person interested so they can feel comfortable and then you draw them in even further. That's a skill I wish I had, and maybe this book can help me develop it, somehow.