Love Is A Song Worth Singing...

Quiet Storm Radio is a strange animal. Last night, while returning from a work engagement in Annapolis (Route 2 either north or south is the most boring drive known to mankind), I hit the WHUR button on my car radio to unwind and I alternated between that and Magic 102.3 for the hour and 20 minute ride home. Music, as evidenced by the Soundtrack of my life posts, is in my eyes the deepest expression of feelings, relationships, historical events, just life as a whole that there is. Love songs are NO different, especially the classics. The first song I heard on the way back was "The Closer I Get To You," by Roberta Flack and the late great Donny Hathaway. I just sighed and listened as I drove a lonely two-lane highway back to an empty apartment.

As another indicator of my vivid imagination and quirky nature, my mind often wanders to situations where the song could apply. Almost always, this song draws back the curtain on a scene of some amazing woman and I just hanging out under the stars, my arm around her, her head either directly on my shoulder or just under my chin on the upper part of my shoulder. A soft kiss here and there, but really, just silence. The kind of silence that speaks of not wanting to ruin a perfectly good moment. Words can sometimes complicate things, especially moments you want to enjoy and it's best not to throw that delicate balance off.

And at that moment, all the b.s. in the world and in your life, be it work, family drama, somebody famous dying every 15 minutes - it simply doesn't exist. It's just you and the one that you care most about, a person that just the sound of their breathing makes everything right in your world. The feel of their skin, the warmth and comfort in their eyes, the harmony of their voice, the sweet and smooth tenderness of their kiss, it all can replace whatever is going wrong at that moment.

That moment is something I think about more and more as the days wear on. That moment, that everlasting tie to a woman who reciprocates the feelings that I feel for her, the peace of she and I together without a care in the world on a clear and comfortable night - THAT'S what I want. Even if I can't have it in my life as of yet, I can turn on Roberta and Donny and let my imagination show me to a love that I feel I'm getting closer to attaining all the time.

High School Highs and Lows: Spanish Class, Part I

My high school's senior class was so small that we only had ONE Spanish class for the entire school year. One period a day for four marking periods. They crammed the 35-40 of us who needed the credit in one of the smaller rooms of our school, but that made for a fun environment. Our teacher was Ms. Pierce, a lovely buxom sister who could've passed for a classmate if she didn't have the authority to pass and fail us. Either way, she let us seniors be, well...seniors. As long as we did our work, she encouraged us to talk, laugh, joke, and in some cases, argue.

One incident that I and my best friends still joke about to this day happened the VERY first day of classes. My boy Y was involved at the time with a girl who had a best friend that nobody at school liked. This is one of those cases where someone is unattractive inside and out. She was just a loud, obnoxious and ignorant chick, and folks took great delight in clowning her when she got out of line. Bitter best friend was mad because her girl was spending QT with Y, which is what boyfriends and girlfriends do, if I'm not mistaken. So Ms. Pierce decides to have us sit according to last name, and the fun begins. Y's last name was very close to bitter best friend's, and one can assume the feelings of envy, hatred, jealousy and resentment all came boiling up to the surface. As soon as my boy gets ready to take his seat....

"OH NO! OH NO! HE CAN'T SIT BY ME! MS. PIERCE, YOU GON' HAVE TO MOVE HIM!" The room just stops and watches her disintegrate in front of our eyes, and me and my other road dog J are in the back of the room howling laughing because this girl is going off because our boy is dating her girl, and she feels like the third wheel - or in her case, third, fourth fifth and AND sixth (I'm sorry, God. Couldn't resist.). Ms. Pierce, whose cheerful sistagurl voice was reduced to a stunned whisper looked around and said, "Y, would you mind sitting in the back with Chris and J? I know you all are very tight." I kicked my bookbag out of the spare desk next to me and waved him over with the biggest damn grin on my face. We all had a great laugh that day. And that was just the start.

Not long after that bit of comedy, there would be some heartbreak, heartbreak so severe that the classroom would see a big strong dude reduced to a vulnerable, hurting mass of teenager...

The Soundtrack Of My Life - Hey Lady....

In a new series of Post Game Show musings (I'm hitting y'all between the eyes with the newness because now I'll have time during the day, yes!), The Soundtrack of my life will highlight songs that I closely associate with certain situations, people, memories, et cetera. And of course, Chris wouldn't be Chris if he didn't associate music, my tied for number one love (with sports and all things wheels) with women. The songs I list will more than likely be linked so you can listen to them and a brief explanation will follow, so sit back and enjoy the Soundtrack of my life....

Golden Lady - Steveland Hardaway Judkins Morris....Stevie Wonder what they call him. There's an innocence in these lyrics that make me feel like a woman this great does exist. A woman with it all across the board. Personality, intelligence, sweetness, with a natural beauty that makes you want to spend a gang of time with her before you even get to the knitty gritty. Hence the hook "Golden Lady, Golden Lady, I'd like to go there..." That means he hasn't even hit it yet! He's gushing over this woman's soft hands, beautiful eyes and smile and how he just wants to spend time with her and then he's like "I want to make love to you eventually." Stevie knows how to charm a woman and make a man feel like this is how it should be done.

Sanctified Lady, Marvin Gaye - Released in the winter of '84-85, more than six months after his death, this song was a leftover from the Midnight Love sessions. You can tell that this was when Marvin was really indulging in that powder, if you get my drift. The original title was Sanctified *woman's sexual organ*, and it showed how Marvin had the madonna/whore mindset down to a science. I'm guilty of this as well - I'm mad when a woman is interested in taking it slow with me, yet I'm always clowning chicks who give it up to certain guys quickly. In the song, Marvin wants a freak, who's "saving her thang for Jesus." That ain't gon' work. Or will it? Hmmm...

Around The Way Girl, LL - While I've blogged about my attraction to women who I shouldn't be caught dead with, I do appreciate a woman who is intelligent, independent and a lady, but still can laugh, joke around and be cool around everybody. I knew quite a few Around the way girls at Del State who were about their business, but still were homegirls when class let out, and to me, that was cool. I love a successful woman just like the next man, but a woman who can turn that off and just be a down-to-earth girl once she's off the clock? Awesome.

Good Girls, Joe - *sigh* One of the most under-appreciated singers of my generation, and me, one of the most under-appreciated guys ever (hey, I'm not always modest *wink*). I was 16 when this song was hot and that was around the time my interest in girls REALLY heated up, but they were like "Chris, you're so sweet, but..." Either I wasn't their type, they looked at me as a true friend, or they were already taken. Much like Joe, I believe there's a girl out there who wants me, and I have to keep working until I happen to meet her.

Insatiable Woman, Isley Jasper Isley - Back to intimacy, I still long for a woman who is attracted to me to the point where she really can't get enough of me physically. Seems demanding and challenging, but I've always felt like if there's mutual attraction and adoration, there are no limits to pleasing one another. Sure there's more to a relationship than sex, but it's a part of any relationship 95 percent of the time. Why not make it the best it can possibly be?

Well, there are more songs that make me think of woman, but these are the first five that come to mind, and they're a unique mix that I think gives you guys a clue of my mindset when it comes to finding and dealing with women. Any questions? Well, you know where the comments go :)

Time Keeps On Slippin'....

I walked around the fields at one of the local high schools early this morning, catching coaches and players for a preview I'm working on and the excitement of kids trying out for different sports was amazing. As I saw kids milling around with their parents and their health forms, meeting coaches and their future teammates who aare ready to get an early start on their season, it reminded me of one totally shell-shocking fact - 10 years ago, around this very same time I began my senior year of high school with the first football practice. Yes, the last class of the last decade of the last century of the second millennium.

1999.

One of our favorite quotes for our class came from Memphis Bleek's verse on the "Money, Cash, Hoes" remix (y'all can't do nothin with this here/for 1, I pack three 9s like the year) and we used it liberally whenever we felt the need to emphasize our seniority over the youngins...they were so the future. We were now, as in 1999 now. My classmates probably don't even remember much about senior year, but I'm still holding on to one experience that's truthfully responsible for much of my issues with women. Don't expect me to elaborate on that until the 10-year anniversary of that comes up, but you'll know it when you see it.

That drama along with missing out on marching because of a geometry credit that I was screwed out of and constant torture by one of the most popular guys at school at the time made my senior year not so fun, but I came out of that alright. If I had only realized back then that I was strong and that God was watching me, I could've saved myself a lot of stress and strain, but I guess better late than never.

I think about Chris in 1998 and Chris in 2008 and I haven't changed that much, but I've changed somewhat. I think around that time is when my shell really grew into a fortress, and that was a bad thing. I'm working on tearing it down now, I've made some significant progress in deconstruction, but I really would like to get the courage to blow the doggone thing to debris and worry about cleanup later. The only folks from high school to really get past that wall were my two best friends, and we're still tight to this day, even though I didn't make it easy for them at all.

I felt so old watching the football team's defensive drills, if someone asked me to "chop it up, dive, roll, left, right, up" these days? The gas face would be serious. It'll be interesting to see come the spring if we have a 10 year reunion. Would I go? Maybe. Would I resist temptation to throw my success in the face of my tormenters? Yes. I'm thankful for what I've been through, both positive and negative. It's making me better day by day, and I'm not gonna impede His work in a fleeting moment of personal triumph. High School was so long ago. Now DSU's homecoming in about two months? I'm just gonna have to ask Him for forgiveness afterwards. Because Big Daddy is showing up and showing out!

I really am thinking about a series of entries about my senior year of high school because we do have some stories worth telling. Names might have to be changed to protect the not-so-innocent, but there will be some stuff. Y'all be sure to hold me to it. It'll be to your benefit :)

Lists By Chris

Alas, as I've been out here grinding, I haven't blogged like I want to, but since the Queen of the Lists La has inspired me, along with a lil' coaxing from Duck, I bring to you Lists by Chris. This entry will consist a list of the good women I know in life. I figure for all my issues with the cluck-clucks who I shouldn't even bother myself with, it's time I give a little love to the ladies who might not want to throw their panties at me, but still treat a brother like a normal human being and actually like and care for me. So here goes:

1. My mom. *Two-steps* I'll always love my mama, she's my favorite girl! I'll always love my mama, she brought me in this world! And that's not to say Paula Jean and I haven't had our share of disagreements and times where we were mad at each other, but truthfully, I'm glad she's the one who gave me the gift of life and the courage and smarts to go for what I want in life. She might have her ways, but that's mom. And I'm thankful for her.

2. The aforementioned Duck. Radio production princess by day and dancing machine diva by night, Duck always manages to use that in between time to fool around with me via AIM and try to convince me that I can't expect a woman to be ready to jump between the sheets with me because she MIGHT like me and wants to know more than my name is Chris and I work as a journalist. And I've said this to her many times, but I'll share it with you all - you KNOW you really have a friend when no matter how fine this woman is, you don't have any different thoughts about her because she truly is a friend. And shockingly, I'm quite alright with that.

3. My DSU crew. *Sigh* The class of 2008, LOL...six chicks, four of which I worked with at the school paper became my closest confidantes in my final three years at Del State, including me in their non-girly activities, and boy did we cut up when they'd have music nights in the newspaper office. I was giving lap dances to their friends, singing songs, they'd have dance routines, freestyle contests, the whole nine. And we'd talk about sex forever (big shock, horny college folks). They were surprised I had as much experience as I did from our talks. Quite frankly, I'm shocked too.

4. Momma T-Dot. Although I believe she secretly HATES the nickname I've given her, T-Dot truly has some maternal characteristics when she's giving out advice and pep talks that really endears her to me as a friend. And there's nothing wrong with that. Between her, Duck and a few other ladies, they've saved me from doing even more damage to myself, if that's humanly possible. And she's funny as hell! The dry humor might've been invented by someone else, but this girl perfected it. Huhlarious.

5. Blogger Nation. I've come in contact with some truly dynamite women via this network and it's been fun knowing them at least through their thoughts and feelings on life, there's Agent Ness, the southern Belle with no filter, and Jameil, the woman of several random thoughts and jokes compounded into one lil ball of energy. La, another southern Belle with an up-north attitude and givesnottadamn swag that makes her awesome, along with another Veronica, whose encouragement and inspiration I've come to cherish. Eb the Celeb, a party girl with a great mind and is as real as real can be, and Exhibit A why older women are really hot in the streets, Miz. Seriously, I can't say how old the oldest women I've ever dealt with was, but let's just say you are not out of my range, Miz. I see ya creepin' *wink*

Truthfully, I know a few more, but if I omitted your name, charge it to my sleepy head and not my heart. For all of you have a place there. Little by little, you ladies are teaching me that I do deserve better than what I give myself credit for, and if I can find a woman with just a little bit of everything from you all, then I truly will be blessed with the woman of my dreams.

KICK IT!

R.I.P to one of the best that ever did it. You certainly weren't "scared of these m***erf***ers!"